Time passes in a flash, isn’t it? It seems just like yesterday that I first started the Vision Board Experiment and now it has been a year. If you didn’t follow the experiment, about the same time last year, I created an electronic picture board of goals encircling major areas of my life. I went about reviewing it everyday – or at least I try to – and wrote 2 major updates.

A year has come and gone. Did the Vision Board work for me like what it has done to John Assaraf in the Secret? We’ll see.

1. Health & Fitness

   After completing the 5km race, things pretty much went into stagnant mode as I became more complacent. I was enjoying some leftover energy from the training and going for a regular jog merely for benefits of a healthier body became weak motivation. Even though logic told me it wasn’t true at all. At that time, I needed another concrete reason for me to keep running. And you know what I did?

   I signed up for a 10km women’s race! I remembered signing off with a tease in my previous update that I’ll probably participate in a 10km run next year. And it actualized! Much earlier than I thought.

   Soon, I was training for the race. I stretched myself to running longer distances progressively and covered 4km, 5km, 6km to eventually surmounting the 8km psychological hurdle. Never in my life had I ever run that far! And that much! If you were to ask me a year ago if I would go for a 10km, I would definitely say “you must be crazy”!

   But that same athletically challenged girl not only overcome her self imposed limitations to complete the 10km race in July this year, she’s now actively training for her next 10km and harbouring a dream to run a half-marathon one day. Could I have done it without the Vision Board? Certainly. But I admit the daily reminders helped.

   Definitely.

2. Living Environment

   While developments in my health & fitness took a strong boost, there wasn’t much “luck” in the living environment sector. I’m still staying in my humble abode. The previous option of bunking in with my other sister also came to a standstill as she faced difficulties balloting for her ideal government housing apartment.

   There were some slight disappointment and frustration initially. Even though I knew right from the start that this isn’t going to materialize in the short run – not in the next 5 years at least – there was still this cherished hope for a “miracle”. Recently however, my thoughts about moving out kind of took a change. I became undecided.

   A few months ago, one of my sisters passed away after a year’s battle with cancer. When I saw how devastated my elderly parents were beside her deathbed, I was heart wrenched. Thoughts such as “who will take care of them when I’m not staying with them” would occasionally flood my mind when I was reviewing the Vision Board. I knew it overrode the intentions I was sending out. Which kind of explained why I was encountering more limitations in this sector than the others.

   Perhaps this is an indication that I should review my goals.

3. Social Activeness

   While I was writing this article, I just received an email from a friend saying she “missed me” and wanted a meetup. Trust me, it can be really heartwarming to know that someone somewhere actually appreciates your company enough to go that extra mile. My stance still stands. When you start detaching any expectations in the things you do for others, it’ll definitely come back to you in ways you never imagined.

   Remember the Google Calendar project I started a year ago? On my own birthday this year, I received more well wishes than I ever did in the past! An overseas friend even sent me a cheque “drawable for unlimited amounts of happiness and joy”. Her creative gift took me by surprise! I cannot imagine who would have the capacity to send me cash! Little did I know that it was something more precious than that! Thank you, my friend.

   A lot of people have also given me great support during my sister’s passing. In fact, some were long lost friends whom I’ve not contacted for quite some time. That gave me an opportunity to reconnect with them and rekindle the relationship.

   As for the romance side of things, nope, no capricorn guy turned up on my doorstep! But there was still a continued abundance of opportunities to meet up new people. And yes, I did exchange numbers with a few eligible guys. But nothing really exciting turned out. At least not as of this writing.

4. Career Development

   Careerwise, I’ve evolved towards a totally different direction. The mastermind groups that I used to be in introduced me to various online business models and opportunities. I researched on these ideas, experimented with a few and went full fledged on one. Though those took time away from Goal Setting College, they were great platforms for me to learn and grow beyond the world of blogging.

   Regardless of the moves I’ve taken in my career, Goal Setting College still remains a very sentimental part of my business. After all, it’s the place that got me started. It’ll still remain as an outlet for my creative expression. But most importantly, it’ll continue to be a place I share my personal learning experiences on.

   “So, what has all these got to do with your Vision Boarding?” Though it may sound far fetched, the way all these opportunities have been “attracted” to me were nothing short of mystical. There were instances when after reviewing my vision board, I would come across an article that talks about something in the new line of business I was interested in. I would also receive joint venture offers or requests in the email. Recently, I’ve even received requests from a relative to do up his business website after he had seen what I’ve done here.

   Coincidences? Maybe. But I choose to believe otherwise. What about you?

5. Financial Wealth

   I didn’t have time for my “pseudo” value stocks portfolio and ended up working on 2 other investments instead. First, on my partially passive portfolio and second, on my new line of business. I took advantage of the current economic downturn to stock up on my index funds and reviewed the performance of my other mutual funds. The fundamentals of the economies are still going strong so even with the reds I’m experiencing now, things will definitely pick up in my opinion.

   As for my other business, I got a profit in less than 2 months. Considering it was something really new to me, I don’t think it was that bad at all!

It has been intriguing experience running the Vision Board experiment on Goal Setting College over the past year. I quit my job, covered long distance races, met new people, rekindled friendships, family ties and came across new business opportunities. Although I agree that not all turned out to be what I thought they should be, such “meanders” & “failures” became springboards for new learnings and realizations as my circumstances changed. I’m glad that I’ve tried it after all!

With the celebration of this one year anniversary, I’ll also be drawing a close on this experiment. Like the Self Hypnosis, Vision boards & visualization is just another way to get your goals to stick in your mind. At the end of the day, you still have to get your hands dirty, do the work and make the change. But that’s one thing I really like about Vision boarding more than anything else.

It can be really fun!

Update : For your convenience, here are all the links to the Vision Board Experiment logs :

• Want to Join Me in a Vision Board Experiment?
• Preparing for my Vision Board…
• How I Created My Vision Board – Revealed!
• 5 Steps to Getting More Out of Your Vision Board Experience
• Vision Board Experiment: Interesting Spate of Events
• Vision Board Experiment: How’s Your Vision Boarding Coming Along?
• Vision Board Experiment: One Year Later…

** Photo by Tanakawho

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One of the common grouses I hear, hindering people from going into a particular challenge is that they believe they don’t have the “X-factor” to excel in it. Usually, it’s after one or two failed attempts in that same domain. Or something so new that they didn’t know what to expect. They’ll say things like “Nah, I’ve tried before and I know I suck”, “I’m just not cut out for that” or “I can never be as good as him” and abandon the whole idea just to save themselves the embarassment. Even when it’s something that’ll definitely expand their lives if they’ll just give it a(nother) try.

I admit I’m not spared of this too. Besides judging myself previously for lacking the talent in sales, I used to think I was a lousy dancer… hehehe. I was a member of the high school choir and during one of our overseas concerts, I was handpicked to take part in an all girls performance item. We had to sing and dance a little at the same time. A few of us – myself included – were so “stiff” that we had to be given remedial lessons in our female instructor’s hotel room every other night before the concert! Yes, we were that bad!

Hardly anyone would comment I’m a bad dancer now whenever my friends and I go clubbing. In case you’re wondering, nope, I didn’t take any dancing lessons. I just changed my thinking. In fact, when I look at it, it’s probably the same process of thoughts that lead me to my sales success. Here’s how :

(1) Expect the Frustration

Trust me, when you’re being challenged with some role or work you’ve previously labeled yourself as having no talent for, the first thing to do is just to expect the frustration. It’ll inevitably bring back the nasty memories of how everyone jeered at you when you were on the stage not knowing what to say, for instance. Your ego is likely to convey that underlying message that you shouldn’t speak in public anymore just to avoid the pain of getting hurt or disappointed again.

Well, don’t beat yourself up over it. Be aware that this is your subsconscious’ way of protecting you. But despite the good intentions, choosing to run away from it is literally putting yourself on dystrophy mode. You’ll never be able to do well in public speaking not because it’s true you lacked the talent but rather because you’ve decided not to give yourself a second shot at it anymore!

(2) Make a Decision & Watch Your Focus Shift

In most of my cases, I realize my frustration and anxiety is at its worse when I’m split on a decision. Whether to take up the challenge or say “no”. The former requires some guts but whenever I do so, the negative energy caused by my frustration soon turned into proactive forces. I’ll start brainstorming ways to alleviate the situation. Such as putting in more effort to practice or research the skill I need to develop.

Strangely at the same time, I’ll find comfort within myself. For example, even though I was worried about affecting the necktie sales, I eventually told myself that my assistance was actually to help my brother-in-law resolve an urgent resource issue, which was far more pressing than a slight drop in Sales.

I find myself focusing on another aspect of the whole situation so much so that it takes the pressure off the results. Think of it this way. Assuming you’ve just taken an examination and the score for a pass is 50 marks. You got 45. If your focus is on passing, I’m sure you’ll feel terrible. But what if your plan is to do better than your previous grade, which was 20 marks? You’ll have achieved 125% improvement, way above what you’ve intended!

(3) Observe > Practice > Review > Practice

When the focus is shifted and the stress to perform is greatly reduced, you’ll gradually build up that self belief that it’s probably not going to be that tough after all. By following up this school of thought with the 4 action steps of observe, practice, review and practice, trust me, you’ll be able to hone the skill that you thought you didn’t have the talent for. Just like what I did to be better in dancing.

After my high school saga, I never really had a chance to dance again. Until my University hostel committee organized a party at a club where we were all invited to the dance floor after the dinner. I was initially reluctant to join them – mainly because I didn’t want to embarrass myself – but when everyone at our table popped down to the dance floor, a friend just dragged me by the arm. I didn’t have time to say “no”.

Under the music and shimmering lights, I suddenly realized that everyone was so busy having fun that no one would notice my obscure dance moves! I began to shift my focus. Instead of being conscious about my dance steps, I just concentrate on swaying my body with the music.

And as I did so, I started taking note of how others danced, played copycat a little, review the response from my friend on my moves – well, she didn’t say anything bad – and quickly continued with it. At the end of the day, I was having so much fun that for the first time ever, I felt that dancing wasn’t totally beyond me! As much as I thought it was.

(4) Have Fun In The Process!

Once everything becomes almost second nature to you through your observation, practice, review and continuous practice, what determines if you’ll ever do well in that domain really depends on how much fun you’re beginning to derive from it. Nowadays, I’m usually the one initiating for a chillout at the clubs, occasionally receiving a bonus compliment that I dance quite naturally. And yes, none believed that I used to be so bad in dancing that I had to have remedial lessons.

Do you now enjoy the attention of speaking on the stage? Are you gradually opening up to the idea of breaking ceilings of sales one after another? Will you like to go dancing to the tune of the music and sweating it out again? When you derive a lot of fun and satisfaction from that something you didn’t know you could do well in, it will eventually develop an impetus for you to know more, learn more and practice more. That, in turn avalanches your achievement as you become skilled in it.

Though I still face a lot of insecurities in reattempting stuff I used to do badly in – things that I totally felt I wasn’t born with the gift for – such little successes over the years have helped to mitigate that frustration and fear. I know there’s still a chance for me to do well in it.

What about you?

** Photo By Bombardier

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I used to think that being able to sell was something you either have. Or don’t have. It’s a talent. I couldn’t articulate as to what it exactly entailed. But there was something I thought I knew for sure. I didn’t have that gift.

When I was in high school, in order to earn some extra pocket money, I tried peddling festive greeting cards with my friends during one of my school vacations. We would carry up to 20 packets of such cards in our backpacks and scour through the residential estates, going from household to household, repeating that same sales pitch to every person we saw over and over again. It was really hard work. I would consider myself lucky if I manage to sell anything at all. Even though I was really lucky once, selling more than 10 packets on one day, I never repeated that feat. Since that vacation, I told myself not to get a sales job. Ever.

In University, I was having a difficult time finding a suitable vacation job and a friend asked me to try telephone sales. For a few dollars an hour, I worked as a telemarketer in a financial planning firm. We were given a list of prospects and for every lead we generate from the list, an extra commission would be given. And if that lead converted to a sale, we would get an additional bonus. For the 2 months I worked there, I didn’t earn any commission or bonus at all. It certainly didn’t feel good. But it worsened when I knew another friend got a commission on the first day she worked!

I started to see these past incidents as an indication that I didn’t have the talent for sales. It was probably that same underlying negative belief why I didn’t want to go into networking marketing or other brick and mortar businesses when I was researching on a new career. I hated the rejection in the face.

Imagine my dilemma when my sister and brother-in-law asked me to help out at his neckties pushcart? On one hand, I really wanted to help him as he was facing a resource crunch. On the other, I was worried about affecting his sales. Even though I was still an implementation consultant then and giving software product sales presentations wasn’t new to me, selling neckties was a bit of a challenge. Not just because I knew nothing about neckties. Or because my previous experiences convinced me that I sucked in sales. But also for the fact that I had pretty bad fashion sense.

“What if the customers want me to give fashion advice?” I remembered asking my sister. Her answer was simple and straight to the point. “Use your instincts”.

Yeah right. If my instincts were that sensitive, I wouldn’t have been such a bad dresser myself! But guess what? What she said really worked. Using my instincts, I managed to persuade a couple of customers to leave their name and telephone number so that we can keep a customer database to encourage repeated sales. Using my instincts, I followed up on a request from a regular customer who ended up purchasing more neckties when my sister tended to him. Using my instincts, I accidentally broke the highest sales record for the pushcart, which till now, is still unbeaten! But where was that instinct when I first started selling festive greeting cards and doing telemarketing?

That was almost a year ago. But the memory is still so fresh that whenever I thought about it, it brings a cheer to my face. I didn’t break a multi-million dollar sales record but the lessons I brought home from the small selling success was much more valuable than that! Here’s what I’ve learned :

Past Failures Hone Your Sales Instinct

While working at the pushcart, I realize that my past failures as a lacklustre festive greeting cards peddler or an under performing telemarketer actually helped in improving my sales instinct! Coupled with my then working experience as an implementation consultant, I was able use that instinct to take the right judgment call based on the customer’s feedback, voice tone and body language. Ironically, without those failed brushes to do sales in my life, I wouldn’t have become a better sales person!

Many people have rejected opportunities in their lives because they couldn’t do something right for the first or even the second time. Myself included. I admit I took up the stint only to bail a relative out. But what did it end up? A sweet selling success that would likely to give me confidence that I can do it again. As long as I put my heart and soul to it!

Don’t Just Sell. Presell Too

My brother-in-law did a great job with the pushcart design. He covered the showcase area with expensive looking black velvet and laid out all the different neckties on it so that anyone walking past would be able to view all the available, beautiful designs at once. Even though there were more than 5 to 6 carts vying for attention at that time, his really stood out. The style and design of the cart, coupled with the wide range of selection, immediately augmented the perceived value of the neckties. Some people were so impressed when they were told the very competitive prices that they bought 10 pieces at one go!

I would love to say I’m a great salesperson but it’s a fact that I didn’t have to do much selling at all. While I was tending the cart, almost 80% of the customers who came to me asking about the prices were already completely presold. All they need was a trigger – in my case, the price – to ignite the purchase impulse.

Perhaps you may be thinking “Nah, that’s not applicable to my industry. I’m selling hospitalization insurance.” Really? Think about it. Aren’t those regular luncheons, courtesy calls or meet ups with your prospects intended so that they would remember to call you up if they do need the coverage? What about name cards? Do you distribute name cards so that it’ll officially introduce yourself as a financial planner or business owner? Whether you choose to believe it or not, these are irrefutably part of the preselling process. And if you do it well, the work is already 80% completed.

Time Sensitive Promotions May Be Cliché but They Still Work

An Indian tourist had finished selecting a necktie when I told him that if he buy two more pieces, he would be able to enjoy a time sensitive discount. He started scanning the showcased selections to add on to the number. By simply reminding the customer of that promotion, I was able to add 2 more sales into the till.

I know there are many skeptics who’re sick and tired of such snake oil salesmen tactics. One time offer, upsells or whatever they call it, looked like sleazy sales tricks designed to squeeze the last drop of blood from their customers. I don’t deny I’m one of those skeptics too. I remember boycotting a particular beautician just because she tried to sell me too much additional stuff I don’t need!

But my short stint made me realize that if this is done without being too intrusive, it’s a great way to increase your supplemental income without destroying the customer’s experience. For example, I noticed that the tourist shortlisted many designs and were mixing and matching a couple of neckties before deciding on that one and only piece. So, I casually reminded him once on the bulk purchase savings, without sounding too aggressive.

If the customer’s really keen – usually reflected in his body language – reminding him once is sufficient. Doing that rampantly and constantly – especially for regular customers – just peeves them off. And you may lose them in the long run. Just like how the beautician lost me as a customer.

Eloquence Flavours The Conversation But Strategy & Sincerity Leaves The Impression

Ask anyone their impression of sales personnel and most, if not all will tell you that they need to speak well. I’ve exactly the same thoughts.

But there’s more to it than meets the eye! Customers nowadays are so adept at detecting sales talk that they will cut you short before you finish your “speech”. As I tested the different ways I interact with the customers, I realize that the success of the deal doesn’t rest on how well the salesperson can speak. But rather how well he can cater to the needs of the influencer!

Let me quote an example. A young trendy couple popped by the pushcart on one of the days I was on duty. Just when I was about to approach them, I noticed that the well dressed female customer started picking and choosing the neckties. She would place a tie on her boyfriend’s chest to visualize how it would look on him. And both of them would burst out in laughter at times over some of the more flamboyant designs.

My instincts told me that the influencer was the girlfriend. She would be the one to decide whether to buy and what to buy even though the boyfriend was the one paying. I thought that since both of them were enjoying the times together and how the girlfriend was so dominant in the choosing process, my intervention might end up peeving her. Instead, I left them alone while standing by the side, offering my sincere service when asked for it. The strategy worked. They bought 3 pieces of neckties after spending 20 minutes going all through the selections!

Networking & Contacts Helps But Aren’t Necessary To Begin With

I don’t deny that strong networks and high profile contacts are important in sales. Especially for those industries which requires more personal interaction such as financial consulting services and wealth management. But are they necessary to get started in the selling game or help you move up the charts? Not necessary.

In a trying bid to boost my sales figures , I sent a mass text message to all my friends and ex-colleagues, asking them to drop by and support me. You know how many people turned up? One. And that friend didn’t even purchase anything. Although I was initially disappointed by the response, the sales that day wasn’t adversely affected. I find myself working even harder to make up for it so much so that the sales was much better than the average. You know something? The day I broke the sales record, I didn’t even ask for any help!

This is also supported by a friend’s observation. A high flying financial planner herself, she told me that she was already working on referral and new leads on the first year she worked. Your existing network and contacts may help you break the zero tally. But what pushes you ahead is your ability to generate good word of mouth and increase repeat or referral sales.

Bearing that in mind and also drawing from what I was already doing online, I took the initiative to ask for the customer’s namecards, email addresses to be added to the records. Customers were so delighted that we bothered to keep up with them and their needs that they gladly obliged. One couple who were migrating to Australia the next day even asked me if we do overseas shipping for our products!

Even though my brother-in-law didn’t continue with the customer list – I carried on this practice in my own business. How?

If you’re reading this article from the RSS news feed or via the email alert, please understand that this is my way of keeping up with you. My ardent reader. The “Customer” of my writing business.

Yes! Thank you for supporting Goal Setting College all this while!

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Since realizing that I was unconsciously “programming” my little niece, I’ve been pretty wary about how I’m interacting with her. Young children are just like sponges and will absorb almost anything we feed into them. They don’t have the filters to differentiate what’s right and wrong and having to correct those improper ones when they’re grown up can be quite an excruciating experience. Not to mention the embarrassment at times.

I used to have this University ex-hostel mate. A brilliant straight-As student. When she was still in junior high school, she got this impression – most likely from her parents – that if a boy and a girl “slept together”, the girl would be pregnant. Well, theoretically she was right, wasn’t she? But apparently her parents omitted the “important prerequisite” for the pregnancy. One day when she went to a school camp, she was so worried the whole night if she would be pregnant the next day that she didn’t sleep well! The whole class of boys and girls slept in the same vacated classroom! Ha ha!

Not many people can be so upfront with their improper beliefs like she did. Talk about it to her friends. Laugh it off as a joke. And develop new beliefs to replace it. Most chose to ignore and let the issue snowball. Some, like my sister, wasn’t even aware of it.

In my opinion, revamping our deep seated negative beliefs and thoughts is necessary. But what’s even more important, is to curb the inflow of lack programming. Otherwise, no matter how much correction you do, you’ll constantly find yourself in a continuous, never ending truckload of negativity & lack.

So what else can you do besides watching what you say or do, censoring your information sources, reviewing your habits and be mindful of the people you hang around with? Here are some other ideas.

(1) Anchoring

This is the same approach I’ve used to condition my niece. It associates a stimuli – either an action or sense – with a particular thought or emotion. In the case of my niece, my rummaging in the bag is a stimuli. The lingering sweet taste of the candy is the thought. In the 1890s, Nobel Laurette, Ivan Pavlov did a similar experiment. He rang a bell as some dogs were given food laced with chilli powder and the moment the dogs saw it, they salivated. After a couple of repeated actions, Pavlov was able to induce the dogs to salivate just by ringing the bell alone!

Now, if anchoring has the power to make my niece run across the hallway for an imaginary piece of candy, chances are you can create your own feel good designer anchors and activate them whenever you want. Especially if you’re in need of a positive boost.

Let’s use an example. Assuming you want to recreate the rush-in-the-adrenaline “ah ha” feeling you often get after reading an inspirational story,

• First, decide on an anchor to activate this feeling. Such as clutching your fingers into a tight fist.
• Refresh your memory of the “ah ha” feeling. If you have problems recalling it, pick up an inspirational story book and re-read it.
• As the sensation gets vivid and reaches its peak, immediately clutch your fingers
• Then release the tension on your fingers as it begins to wear down. Otherwise, you may be also associating the anchor to a draining adrenaline loss if you keep holding on to the tension.
• Once the feeling is totally gone, relax in a count of 10.
• Repeat the steps above to make sure the anchoring stays.
• Test it out!

I was giving this anchoring method a test drive at the point of writing this article. During the anchoring process, I was constantly practicing it with my right hand and it works wonderfully. When I tried the same using my left hand, hey but I don’t get the same feeling at all. Interesting.

Go ahead. Give it a try.

(2) Affirmations or Positive Self Talk

By constantly repeating a positive statement to yourself everyday, you hammer a thought, condition or feeling into your subconscious mind, inducing it to believe as true. To do this, you need a piece of paper, a dash of creativity and not to forget, a continuous flow of emotions and persistence :

• Write down the phrase “I am so happy “ on the paper.
• Continue writing the condition or feelings you want to achieve. Something like this :
  “I am so happy that I am now achieving total success in every aspect of my life. Good health, true happiness and money flows into my life in an easy, relaxed and positive way.”
• Feel free to add your goals into the statement if you want. Some people gets very positive vibes whenever they dream or talk about their goals. You may be one of them.
• Take out this piece of paper and read the statement to yourself loudly and emotionally every morning and evening

I had a chance to play around with affirmations many years ago and frankly, I didn’t have had much good results with it. Reading the statement out loud every night felt like a chore as I wasn’t able to summon strong emotions and feel for the words. Sometimes, I even forget to read them! Spicing up the process by listening to motivational music helped, but over the course of the year, I’ve found an easier and more effective way to work with affirmations. That is, reading it via Dr Lens’ approach, also known as the Hoponopono method. I’ve briefly mentioned this method in a previous article.

Through the use of 4 simple phrases during my daily chanting prayers, I was often able to invoke positive emotions pretty easily. I guess reciting the phrases towards someone with a spiritual connection allows me to take accountability for my problems, seek forgiveness, express gratitude & love at the same time, all of which are pretty powerful sensations. There were times when I could literally feel a shudder running through my spine. You’ll feel as if you’ve just confided in someone, letting go of the truckloads of negative emotions within you to make way for the positive ones. And yes, I usually get pumped up and reinvigorated afterwards.

(3) Self Hypnosis

Even though I’ve yet to achieve great results with self hypnosis, many people have reported huge success with it. They use it to lose weight, quit smoking and some even use it to increase their self esteem! Sounds incredible, isn’t it?

Self hypnosis can be pretty similar to affirmations in that you run suggestions and positive statements through your mind everyday. The difference is, you do it in a sleepy or trance like state often conducted via the hypnotist’s voice in a tape. It’s believed that the mind is less likely to resist the suggestions during a semi conscious state, making it easier to alter one’s consciousness.

Sometimes, the hypnosis can also put you into an imaginary setting so that you’re able to draw certain observations from your interaction with the situation. For example, I remembered listening to a hypnosis tape to help me predict how I would fare 10 years’ later. The speaker led me into an imaginary woods to locate a house and asked me to describe it to myself. “The house will be your home in the future” he said. I was subsequently asked to step into the house to greet the future “me” and my family.

And you know what I saw? I saw myself dressed in a house dress with my “husband”. Gee, I thought I really looked like a housewife. The other funny thing was, the guy who was supposed to be my “husband” looked like someone I was admiring at that time! Ha ha. Though I can’t imagine myself being a housewife and the “husband” whom I was supposed to be with is now happily attached to someone else, the whole self hypnosis experience was quite fun.

However, it’s important to note that no one can be “hypnotized” against his own will. That means, if you’ve bought a self hypnosis tape thinking that it wouldn’t help, chances are, it wouldn’t. Because, the effect of hypnosis really depends on your motivation, willingness and faith to make it work for you.

If you’re interested to learn more about self hypnosis and find out if it works for you, try signing up for this free 5 day online eCourse to get free hypnosis lessons, audio samples, worksheets and even a trance script in your email.

(4) Profiling

I’m sure you’ve heard of this. If you want to be successful, emulate the ones who are there because success leaves clues. That’s the principle behind profiling. Say you want to play tennis as well as Roger Federer, you can read his autobiography, watch his every matches, analyze his strokes and factor them into your own practice. While reading and watching more about him, you begin to adopt as many of the habits that lead to his success as an accomplished tennis player. In other words, you play copycat.

Profiling can be a rather powerful programming technique. But like all approaches described, it’s also a double edge sword. Drawing a line between picking up only the good habits versus idol worshipping can be a challenge for people who constantly like to use profiling to program themselves. I know that’s ironical but it’s true. For example, haven’t you seen young people smoking pot because their glamourous celebrities in Hollywood do it as well? Or young achievers sinking into complacency because their idols fall for it too?

(5) Vision Board

Many people thought Vision Boards are just for physical goals. But if you recall my Vision Board experiment, positive emotions can also be included in it as well. For example, under the Health & Fitness section of my Vision Board, I’ve used a picture of a man jumping into the air to signify the vitality associated with good sleep and regular exercise. To make that feeling even more obvious, I attached the affirmation “I Feel Healthy and Energetic After Sleeping Well and Exercising Regularly” to that.

I’ve personally derived a lot of fun from my Vision Board experiment and would strongly recommend this approach to anyone who’s keen to give add a little positivity in your life without losing all the joy. Do refer to one my earlier articles How I Create My Vision Board – Revealed! if you need help with creating your own Vision Board.

(6) Gratitude Journaling

Do you know that being grateful for the little things you possess in life can actually increase your happiness level by 25%? In an exclusive interview with Sharpbrains.com, Professor Robert Emmons revealed this finding in his 2003 paper.

In his research, more than a hundred people were asked to keep a journal and subsequently separated into 3 different groups. The first group was asked to write about anything they felt grateful about. The second, on issues that they felt disturbing and irritating. And the last, on matters that had a great impact on them. After 3 rounds of experiments and analysis, people in the 1st group were concluded to enjoy a higher level of general well being than the other 2 groups! They slept better, exercised more and had better expectations of the week ahead.

On hindsight, it’s not difficult to understand why. When one’s always complaining, he’s constantly engaging his mind to think of how life has been unjust to him, totally clouding the possibility that he can breakthrough this with a bit of effort. Sometimes, sticking your head out for a breath of fresh air by just focusing on your “haves” rather than your “don’t haves” will let you see things in a totally different perspective. Remember, when you start changing what you see, the things you see change.

I don’t keep a personal gratitude journal but am seriously tempted to do so now!

(7) Masterminding

When I first wrote The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups, I belong to 2 teams which were more of the open and communicative style. One was structured as a members only forum and whoever has a question, can raise it to the floor. The other was confined to email correspondences. Even though both groups were very much dormant now, during the times when they were active, one of the first things I would do everyday was to login to the forum or my email to check if there were any new ideas or case studies reported by the teams.

It was very inspiring to hear of any successes. Especially those that came about as a result of the group. Because it proved one thing. If they could do it, so could I. The only question was, how? And my mind would be so focused on brainstorming the followup strategies that I didn’t have much bandwidth left for brooding over negative stuff.

** Photo By Derrick T

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Kids are one of the world’s most insightful teachers. Don’t you agree?

One Friday evening, as I was preparing to meet some friends for dinner, my toddler niece was contentedly sitting on the couch playing with her toys. I was running a bit late and wanted to inform my friends. Just as I was frantically rummaging through my bag for my mobile phone, my niece slided off from her seat and ran towards me.

“Candy! Candy!” she blurted, looking like a little puppy hungry for a T bone. She kept pointing her little index finger at my bag, as if telling me that there was a hidden trove of candy in it.

I was bewildered. Why would my rummaging of the bag incite such excitement from a 2 year old? And why did she assume that there was candy in my bag? Even though there was absolutely none in it? Just when I was thinking about this, a bolt of realization struck me!

There were 2 isolated occasions when I had offered her candy taken out from my tote bag. My repeated actions must had created an anchor in her pure and innocent mind! So much so that when she saw me rummaging through my bag, she started assuming that I was about to give her a candy treat!

Intriguing, isn’t it?

One small action can actually has a controlling impact over another individual. What makes it even more fascinating is, it was never my intention to influence her. And if my seemingly unintentional actions could have conditioned my niece in such a way, what are the little things you’re doing every day that are unconsciously forming your beliefs and perceptions? Could these play a part in expanding or limiting your success consciousness? And what can you do about it if that’s not what you want?

Ways You Get Conditioned … Unconsciously

Whether you like it or not, it’s a fact you’re constantly being programmed. Look at the many advertisements around you. What comes to your mind when you think of a particular brand of beer? Macho? Manly? Makes a guy popular with women? It’s definitely no coincidence why beer ads in the past used hunky men and sexy women as models.

Every time you watch such commercials, their slogans and images gets drilled into your subconscious mind. It’s only a matter of time before you start thinking that, that particular brand of beer will help you become more masculine and attractive.

Day in day out, the words you say, the resources you read or watch, the habits you cultivate and even the people you stick around with are sculpting you into the person you become or forming the thoughts you embrace. Unfortunately, 95% of these are actually focusing on something you detest : lack and limitation. Here’s why :

(1) Catch Phrases & Vocabulary You Use

I still remember reading a very interesting story in Napoleon Hill’s Think & Grow Rich. A bank official, Joseph Grant misappropriated and gambled funds from the bank that he worked at. Trying to avoid the bank auditors, he hid in a local hotel and was so fearful that he kept repeating these words over and over again as he wailed and moaned “My God, this will kill me! I cannot stand the disgrace.” When the police found him, he was dead. Although Joseph Grant’s story sounds unbelievable, it’s a true story. And it bears testimony to this fact : what you say endears on the mind. Sometimes, the impression can be so deep that it kills. Literally.

Take a moment to reflect the daily conversations with your friends and family now. What do you hear? Are you constantly using negative catch phrases such as “I can’t… “, “I’m afraid…” “It’s too difficult…”, “I shouldn’t have”? What about negative vocabulary such as “problem”, “doom”, “worse”, “mistakes” etc? As you recall, not only will you realize that such words have assimilated into your daily life, they’re more often than not, limiting and at times self derogatory.

For example, one of my sisters likes to attach the catch phrase “What can I do?” at the end of her sentences. Especially when she’s complaining. Even though she doesn’t mean anything when she says that, it’s unknowingly downplaying her perception of her problem solving capability. That’s why she often find herself helpless when met with certain challenges. And when I share with her my findings, do you know what she said?

“Gee, this is the way I talk… What can I do?”

(2) Information You Take In

Just like TV advertisements, the type of books, websites, drama serials, movies and other resources you digest mould your perception. If you take a moment to challenge some of your old limiting beliefs or behaviour, it’s not difficult to see the relationship between the two.

When I was younger, I used to believe that rich people are mean and evil. After all, if the rich aren’t mean and evil, why would Shylock the wealthy moneylender, want a pound of Antonio’s flesh in Shakespeare’s The Merchant of the Venice? And why would Robin Hood want to rob them to help the poor? My exposure to those literature gave me the perception that one has to resort to underhanded means to be wealthy.

Because I don’t want to branded “mean” and “evil”, I was narrowing my own prosperity consciousness. That kind of sabotaged my bid to enjoy a higher pay package when I was in my earlier job applications. I was constantly thinking of ways why employers wouldn’t give me the pay I desired. Subconsciously I felt I had to undercut to get the position I wanted! A couple of my personal projects – to seek financial independence – also didn’t take off during that time.

At first, I found it pretty hard to link the two together. But as I learned to expand my self consciousness, I noticed that things improved. Much to my own amazement.

(3) Habits You Cultivate

Never undermine the habits you cultivate over the years because there’s probably a deep seated meaning behind them. For example, if you’ve been doing the most urgent things on your To-Do list everyday you reach the office, you’re sending the message that it’s alright to bypass stuff that seems less urgent but actually have far reaching impacts.

Chances are, when you’ve to make a choice between going after your dreams versus staying in your current job, you’ll likely go for the latter. Because having food on the table seems more urgent, isn’t it?

Most people don’t realize the impact of their habits on their behaviour and recklessly indulge in those that limits their growth. Myself included. I remember hosting a business associate from Sri Lanka many years ago. He noted, “You know something? When I was in the subway carriage, I noticed that almost everyone was holding a mobile phone and busy texting away. In my country, we will smile and chat with the person next to us.” Guess what? I was blushing when I heard that. Because while waiting for him, I was texting another friend on my mobile!

Has the advance of technology and our casual habits made us oblivious to the importance of personal touch and networking?

(4) People You Associate With

Do you know that the average income of the 5 closest people around you has a direct impact on yours as well? I know this may appear unsettling but it’s not difficult to understand why. If those people around you are earning a respectable income, it gives a lot more credibility that you can do the same. If not better.

A friend of mine used to be in the same situation. She was earning a paltry salary as a merchandiser in a renowned departmental store. When she got to know her boyfriend and his high flying buddies, she started to become more conscious of the fact she was very much underpaid. After considering her options and prospects, she is now a lecturer in a local college and earns a much more respectable salary. If I’m not wrong, it’s definitely comparable to her boyfriend and friends.

Not only is this true about wealth generation, it’s also applicable to other aspects of your life. Such as health & fitness. Before I got to know the bunch of sports enthusiasts I’m currently hanging out with, learning to play squash or going on mountain trekking expeditions was something I would never considered. Since then, not only have I picked up the game and went to a few trekking trips, I’ve even took part in a 5km marathon!

How To Control Your Programming

There’s no way we can totally reject programming into our lives. But the good news is, you can control what you’re exposed to and reject negative stuff that you’re constantly feed with.

Here’s are the different ways.

** Photo by Proverbs 31:10

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“…he was indeed admirable. He might be gone. But at least he left the world pursuing his passion, truly living his life the way he wanted it to be.”

As I typed those words into a mobile text message to my friend, a tinge of sadness swept over me. I sighed heavily.

About a month ago, a national disaster happened to the peaceful tropical island that I live in. 5 passionate paddlers of the national dragon boat team were drowned when their boat capsized in an unfortunate accident. They were participating in a regional tournament in Cambodia. And one of them was my good friend’s ex-boyfriend.

When death happens to someone you know personally, the feeling is very surreal. The former nonchalance is replaced by a deep sense of regret. Which lingers no matter how hard you try to shake it aside. At the same time, your fundamental values and philosophies get challenged. You start wondering “What if it happens to me, can I steadfastly say the same thing of myself? That I also lived the life I wanted it to be? Or at least tried doing so?”.

I’m not sure if I would say that in the past. But now, my answer is a astounding “yes!”

What about you? Did you try living the life you wanted it to be too?

The Law of Cause & Effect

Trust me. If you try hard enough, keeping your sight firmly on the outcome you want to achieve, the power of the Law of Cause and Effect will help you along the way.

In his book, 21 Secrets of Self Made Millionaires, Brian Tracy tries to put this into context. He explains that in life, for every action, there is a reaction. That means, if you’ve consciously made a decision to live the life you wanted to, this action of saying “Yes” will trigger off a wave of reactions that will bring you closer to the result you so desire.

When I first graduated from college for example, I started off as an auditor in a local public accounting firm and would’ve continued where I was. If I didn’t make the conscious choice to switch into something that I was more fascinated with – financial systems. And if it wasn’t for my next job in the IT sector, I wouldn’t have got to know that business associate who introduced me to a popular book on personal financial management. Without reading that book, I don’t think I would have been inspired to learn more about personal development nor be inclined to start my own business. If not for all this, I wouldn’t be here writing professionally on Goal Setting College.

You see the connection?

It just took one small bold step of going after a job I’ve more interest in to spark off that domino sequence of events. That is the power of the law of Cause & Effect. Without the first step, there can never been a second. Without the second, there can never be the third. Indeed, I’m very grateful for that.

And if you’ve been contemplating to live the life you’ve always wanted but don’t know how you should go about doing so, here are 5 steps you can consider. I truly attest to these because they’re the same concepts which made my previous dream a current reality.

(1) Make a Conscious Decision & Say Yes

Before taking that first bold step, you’ll have consciously agree to live the life you wanted. Because if you don’t, you’re simply deluding yourself and wasting precious time drafting goal plans, creating vision boards only to find yourself scramming back where you started from when the situation calls for a confident jump.

It happened to a friend of mine. She was always telling me that she wanted to go into real estate and be a high flying property agent. She had even taken courses and signed up for related memberships. But when she couldn’t find time to take client’s calls during her full time job’s office hours, she decided to just quit the part-time jig. Well, it seemed that I was the only one convinced that she had made the decision. The more important person didn’t.

Herself.

(2) Think of The Final Effect

What is it that you’ve wanted so badly that you’ll do anything to achieve it? Yes, anything. Including giving your precious time and energy to learning it, fine tuning it and eventually mastering it?

Many people will go for wealth. And they usually end up spending half of their lifetimes slogging hard for the money. Sticking to a job they didn’t like but paid well. Dabbling in all kinds of money making schemes only to give up when they realize they actually require a lot of work.

But ask yourself, would you regret not spending enough time earning another extra dollar on your death bed? Or would you relive not pursuing your dreams, treasuring the wonderful times with your partner, family and friends? You’ll probably go for the latter, won’t you? But if these things are so important that we’ll regret not doing it at the last moment before we die, why is it that we don’t pay them due attention now?

Well, it could be that we’ve taken them for granted after all. My good friend told me that after her ex boyfriend’s death, she would cry every time she heard a particular song. The lyrics reminded her of the fact that she didn’t treasure him when they were together. Don’t let that happen to you.

Fast forward to the day that you’re lying in your coffin and your best friend’s reading your eulogy to the congregation attending your funeral. What will you like it to contain? That is the final effect you want to achieve. That is the life you want to lead. And the legacy you want to leave behind.

To help you with this exercise, take a look at how mine would be :

You heard the howling wind? It must be her, Ellesse. It was just like her to stay around you and create a racket when everything seemed so solemn and dull. Yesterday, she was just around us, sharing her years of accomplished dreams and achievements. And today, she’s gone. Not literally. Because we know she lives in our hearts. Always encouraging us. Always inspiring us.

Yes, that’s the Ellesse we know.

Back in year 2007, when everyone’s chasing what others have set for them, Ellesse chose to defy convention and left the corporate world doing what she loved. We were shocked. But we gave her our blessings, knowing right from the start that Ellesse wouldn’t act without careful deliberation. Indeed, we were proven correct.

Over the years in which she had followed her heart, she was very successful in her chosen career, helping many more others achieve their dreams and lead the life they’ve wanted, than she had ever imagined. She also made many astute investment calls, owning one of the best managed investment portfolio among our peers. Despite her ailing age, Ellesse never lost her youth at heart. She traveled around the world, brought cheer to people around her and contributed back to her community as much as, if not more than what she had benefited from.

Thank you. We thank you on behalf of Ellesse for coming. Because we know she would say the same.

Yeah, that’s Ellesse alright. Always so grateful for whatever little she had. We will always remember her. Her cheerful personality, her vibrant smile and her wonderful legacy.

The above is also my response to my friend Peter’s (from IWillChangeYourLife) challenge to write my own eulogy, a project started by Todd from WeTheChange.

(3) Hold That Intention & Develop It

Rome is not built in one day. Dreams aren’t too. Keeping in mind the type of life you’ll like to lead after you’re identified your “Final Effect”, expand it in the form of a working movie. The more intricate it is, the closer to reality it gets.

Conjure images relating to different aspects of the physical scene you’re looking at and slowly add sounds, fragrances, colours and as many people as you like. Think of how you’ll fare in different dimensions of your life by then :

• Health & Fitness – Do you work out on a regular basis? Are you physically fit?
• Mental Wellbeing – Are you satisfied with your overall self image & your life?
• Emotional Condition – Do you in control of your emotions?
• Physical Attractiveness – How do you look? Suave? Elegant?
• Human Relationships – Are you spending quality time with your family? How’s your relationship with your spouse?
• Living Environment – Where are you staying then?
• Social Activeness – Do you have time for your friends? Do you participate in fun activities?
• Spiritual Happiness – Do you seek nourishment from your divine spiritual self?
• Career Development – Are you doing what you love?
• Financial Wealth – How’s your retirement planning coming along?

Hold that intention and let the images settle. Close your eyes and breathe in deeply.

(4) Determine What You Can Do Now

It’s easy to be caught up dreaming too much that you forget about action. That’s where goal setting comes in. Once you have a clearer picture of your destination, dive in straight to constructing your goals. If you need some help with this, feel free to download my free exclusive tutorial and start working towards your 1 year goals.

Goal setting helps you to put a seemingly distant dream into a concrete blueprint. And as you’re working through the goal plan, you’ll start seeing the law of the cause & effect in action, gradually evolving to impact the various dimensions you’ve intended the changes in and move you closer to the life you’ve always wanted to lead.

Slowly but surely.

(5) Be Scared, Be Terrified But Do It Anyway

While working through your goal plan, it’s very likely you’ll experience periods of fear and anguish. Instead of questioning and bashing yourself for being such a weakling, bear in mind that it’s perfectly normal to feel scared and terrified. Rant to a friend about it. Go for a spin. Drink some booze. But once you’re done, keep your sight focused on what you should do. And do it anyway.

When I told my last boss – who was based overseas – I was resigning for example, I actually incubated the courage for almost a month before I astutely told him over the phone. A seemingly simple act of saying “I’m quitting” can actually ignite such fear in me. Silly, isn’t it?

Luckily, my fear of missing out on my dream was much greater than that. I did it. And here I am, writing and signing off this article now.

Phew, what a close shave!

** Photo by *Zara

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If that’s the question you’ve been wanting to ask me, the answer is this – so far so good!

Since the day I’ve decided to embark on this Vision Board Experiment, I’ve gone through more interesting changes than I’ve ever experienced in any one year. Quit my job, regained my life back and took the initiative to be much more active socially. What more can I ask for from a small little test started purely out of fun?

Even though I’ve not been regularly updating my progress on Goal Setting College, the intended changes have readily – albeit slowly – manifested in different areas of my life since the last update. Trust me, it can be pretty intuitive. You know it happened. But you just don’t know why. You thought it may be related to the Vision Board. But you just don’t feel anyone else will think it’s logically connected.

In any case, I leave the judgment to you. Let’s delve into my progress details, shall we?

Health & Fitness

In the first few months after my last update, I tried to start a regular jogging routine. Every 2 or 3 times a week, I would pop over to the neighbourhood stadium and run at least 2km. That might come across as trivial for someone who’s a fitness buff. But for me, it was quite a big deal. Especially since I had almost lost touch with regular exercise after my Preuniversity days when physical education lessons were compulsory. I used to play squash and go to the gym. But those instances were so rampant that much as I would like to, they weren’t really considered “regular” in the real sense.

My family members were equally “impressed” with my sudden enthusiasm. Whenever I told my mum I was going for a morning jog, she would look at me with a skeptical yet approving expression. Skeptical as to whether I would sustain the momentum. Yet approving at the same time that I was doing at least something constructive.

Oh well, not all her fears were totally unfounded. I really didn’t sustain the momentum. Because about a month after I went into this routine, I started to get this painful jolt in my right knee every time I jog. As as result, I was forced to take a short break to let my knee recuperate.

But during that short rest, my mind didn’t stop thinking about exercising. And to help me gather the lost momentum, I even did the unthinkable. Something that I thought I would never do in the past. I signed up for a 5km women’s run and even cajoled a friend to accompany me!

Yes, someone who had previously refused invitations from other friends to take part in long distance running actually signed one up herself. And even asked a friend along. Come to think of it, I still wasn’t sure why I did what I did. But it was quite an experience. In fact, I like it so much that I think I’ll participate again next year. Maybe a 10km this time!

Living Environment

I could have omitted this section. Especially with the rising property prices in the tropical island that I stay, getting my own place seemed to be more difficult. But despite the seemingly bleak chance I’ll ever realize my intentions in this area of my life, I never really gave up visualizing for some breakthrough.

And you know what happened?

About a week ago, while sharing with my sister – who was married a month ago – about my desire to move out, she mentioned that I could stay with her when she gets her new government housing apartment.

Well, not too bad huh? I may not get my own apartment yet but at least I’ve got another option.

Social Activeness

One of the areas that I’ve seen a tremendous boost is my social life. Since I’m now predominantly working from home, it can be quite a drag traveling to town just to meet a couple of friends for dinner. But surprisingly, I don’t find myself feeling that often. On the contrary, I find myself taking the initiative more and even organizing meet ups with friends I’ve not seen for a while.

As for company I didn’t really enjoy, instead of bumping up excuses not to join them, I became really upfront with them and rejected the invitations. In my opinion, being more socially active doesn’t mean going for every gathering or meet ups you’re invited but in being comfortable and appreciative in every gathering you go.

My initiative and the Google Calendar project – mentioned in my last update – kicked off a very positive karmic cycle. Friends start “noticing” my presence and will include my name in their invitation lists. And it certainly helps that I’m quite a bubbly character to add cheer to such parties! Haha, just joking. Through these little exercises, I’ve also learned to appreciate the gift of giving before receiving. When you’re generously creating opportunities for people to meet up without any expectation of return, you’ll definitely get something back. Maybe not from the same person. But it definitely gets reciprocated. It’s intriguing how the Universe functions. You don’t know how. But you know it just works.

Perhaps due to such regular gatherings, the chances of meeting new people increased. Including new romantic dates. Interestingly, even though I had never made any set up requests, I had had people coming to me and say “Hey, I want to introduce you to a friend of mine…” Maybe they sensed the vibes through my Vision Boarding! During social gatherings, I even had guys coming up to me and introducing themselves. Seriously, I seldom had such encounters before the experiment and there were too many occasions for me to dismiss them as “coincidences”.

Despite the increased amount of opportunities, ha, none of them are Capricorns. Or at least based on what I know.

Career Development

Since embarking on my career online, I’ve gained much much more than I’ve put in. I’ve learned to slow down and appreciate the many things and people around me. I’ve spent more time everyday talking to my elderly parents, playing with my toddler niece, baby nephew and interacting with my siblings. When a family disaster happened many months back, I was glad my flexible hours allowed me to be physically there for my family.

I’ve never regretted this decision.

Yes, that’s even though I’ve difficulty explaining to friends what I’m doing. That’s even though I’m taking home much lesser than what I was earning as an implementation consultant then. What I’ve gained is what money cannot buy.

A better quality of life. And the power to go after my dreams.

As I continued with my vision boarding, many new ideas and opportunities to grow Goal Setting College have popped up along the way. I was invited to join mastermind groups. I toyed with different writing styles and I went for a blog redesign. When I did a recap, I was amazed at how Goal Setting College has progressed.

Thank you. Thank you for your support all this while. And I know the only way I can return the favour is to continue to generate the kind of content you’ve subscribed for!

Financial Wealth

Significantly in this area, I find myself paying for a year’s subscription to a value stocks simulation service and creating a partially passive portfolio consisting of 2 index funds and several mutual funds. I would have gone for a complete passive mix of index funds if there were more options offered in my country!

The initial plan was to park my savings into the portfolio while I spend some time researching on the companies to invest in. Sad to say so far, my energies has been so focused on Goal Setting College that I’m neglecting this important part of the value stock investing process.

But I’m glad I still managed to kick off the partially passive portfolio. The baby step to smarter investing.

Alright, that’s so far the update from me. How about yourself? How are you progressing with your own Vision Boarding exercise? Maybe you’ll like to share with me in the comments? Should you prefer a more private update, please feel free to drop me an email. I’ll love to know how you’re faring too! Oh well, if you’re one of those still hesitating whether to do up your own Vision Board, maybe my friend Edward Mill’s contest can inspire you to try it. Have fun and experience these life changing moments for yourself!

Update : For your convenience, here are all the links to the Vision Board Experiment logs :

• Want to Join Me in a Vision Board Experiment?
• Preparing for my Vision Board…
• How I Created My Vision Board – Revealed!
• 5 Steps to Getting More Out of Your Vision Board Experience
• Vision Board Experiment: Interesting Spate of Events
• Vision Board Experiment: How’s Your Vision Boarding Coming Along?
• Vision Board Experiment: One Year Later…

** Photo by Aussiegall

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What if you’ve decided to start your own mastermind group? What are the things you should consider or take note of?

In reality, the 5 earlier steps of finding a mastermind group will still apply except that this time, the role is switched. Instead of appealing for mastermind leaders, you’re out there sourcing for potential members.

What Kind of Members Should You Be Looking Out For?

If your goal’s to find partners in a business venture, more often than not, you’ll require a team with various specializations. Perhaps someone who’s a business owner himself. Or another person with experience in marketing and promotions. Such as an accounts director in a major advertising agency or a newspaper editor.

Regardless of what it is, it’s important for you to brainstorm on a list of required skills & criteria prior to that and slowly match it up with the people you know. While you may not get Steve Jobs or Seth Godin in your group, you’ll probably find yourself touching base with people you never thought would partner with you! You won’t know unless you ask, right?

If it’s very remote that you’ll ever find someone like that within your circle, start connecting with the grapevine and get the word out. At the same time, tap on your existing physical network and leverage outwards using the 6 degrees of separation method. These work even for goals that are seemingly more domain specific. Such as weight loss or parenting.

During the first contact with these potential members, avoid the impulse of recruiting them straight away. Spend some time instead getting to know them personally. Their skillsets, knowledge, likes and dislikes etc. During the interaction, grab the opportunity to find out their current goals, commitment and whether they’re open to the idea of joining a mastermind group.

Trivial as it may sound, getting to know your potential members is actually one of the most important part of this whole process. Because once you’ve managed to find someone who’s able to connect with you and jell with the other team members, the rest is easy. The chemistry’s likely drive and sustain the momentum within the team.

How Do You Conduct The Official Recruitment?

You can call, private message, email or even meet them up in person. Personally, I would prefer writing an email or private message prior to the meetup or call as this would give the other party, time to consider. Always remember to highlight the benefits of joining your team and trust that the subsequent face to face or direct interaction will affirm the chemistry. If meetups or phonecalls are not possible in your context, an email or private message is perfectly fine. As long as you’re comfortable.

So, how should you write the recruitment email? With a little bit of practice and a bit of creativity, writing such emails can actually be quite fun. Let’s play a little game, shall we?

Assuming I’m Amy Davies, a budding entrepreneur who’s starting a new line of kids apparel, this is what I’ll write in the email invite to Paulo Ralph, a renowned designer :

Dear Paulo,

My name is Amy Davies, an aspiring entrepreneur based in San Diego with a focus on designer kids apparel. Though I’m pretty new in the fashion industry I’ve already got some interest in a project team that would expand on an commercial idea to start a new line of kid’s apparel for the 3-6 year olds.

Given your reputation in the fashion design arena, it’ll be fantastic if you’re able to join us. And I’m sure you’ll be able to derive a lot of synergy from the group. Imagine having a business owner, lawyer, accountant, banker and accounts director to help you work through some of your professional as well as personal issues? Wouldn’t that be good reason for you to spend an hour a week with us?

We’ll be meeting every week via Skype to review some of our ideas for the initiative as well as our individual challenges so do let me know if you can be part of the team. Oh, by the way, do you happen to know George Andrews? He’s already a member.

I’ll be glad to meet up with you next Saturday to discuss this in detail. Till then!

Cheers,
Amy

Now, bearing the above draft in mind, take out a piece of paper and write your own email. After you’re done, read it out loud a couple of times. Get another person to vet it through. Does it sound sincere? Does it give a winning proposition to other party?

If the answer is yes, great. You’ve just created your own recruitment email!

What’s the Mode of Operandi?

In case you’re wondering, I’m referring to the way each review should be conducted. There are no hard and fast rules as it really depends on each member’s preferences. But here are 2 common structures that I’ve seen :

• The Open Communicative Style

  Suitable for larger mastermind groups, there’s no stipulated review sessions and it’s usually conducted in private online forums or offline luncheons settings. Members pose their challenges to the floor and others contribute by responding, or benefit by reviewing other’s feedback. Even though this can save a lot of time, it may not necessary be suitable for everyone. Especially members who are least likely to air their issues in front of a relatively larger audience. Hence, don’t be surprised if you actually find smaller groups breaking off to work on their separate projects.

• The Closely Knitted Private Teams

  Consisting of 5-6 members, such small teams are one of the premises of traditional masterminding. Reviews are conducted once a week, a month or even once a year. Either in person or via teleconferences, web casts and skype. How and when these are practiced in reality depends on what’s necessary to keep everyone on target. But no matter what it is, try to keep the review duration to be an hour or so, to avoid becoming too draggy and inefficient. Here’s a proven review process format you can consider :

Step 1 : Initiation
The team leader starts off welcoming everyone and reiterate the rules of the discussion, such as the 10 minutes time allocation to each person and some important guidelines from the code of conduct. He will then name one member to kick off Step 2 and keep the time.

Step 2 : Round Robin Updates

Every member who speaks up during his turn needs to focus on 3 key updates. First, whether he has any achievements or news since the last meeting. Though simple, this act has the power to motivate everyone and set the spirits high for the rest of the discussion.

Second, if he needs extra time and what he’ll be using this on. This will cue the team leader and signify the possible overrun.

Lastly, his challenges that he’ll like the team to brainstorm solutions for. During this while, group members can interact and make suggestions to the member. But after the allocated time is up, the team leader will aptly move on to the next member’s sharing.

Step 3 : Next Discussion’s Targets

Once everyone has completed their round robin updates, each member will be asked in turn again their targets for the next discussion. This helps to raise accountability and constantly engage each member’s involvement.

Step 4 : Wrap Up

Towards the end of the discussion, the team leader will express his gratitude for everyone’s presence and if necessary, ask each member to share their appreciation for a particular member.

If you’ve decided to try something different with your group, by all means go ahead. In fact, mastermind groups are one of the best platforms to showcase your creativity! However, if you prefer not to reinvent the wheel too much, I’ll recommend using the above mentioned review format during the first review and constantly modify as you proceed along.

With the above, I’ve come to the end of this Beginner’s Guide Series and I hope you’ve enjoyed reading it!

Though this may come across as a pretty mundane topic, Masterminding is irrefutably one of the most powerful tools you can use to move your goals forward. I’m certainly a convert! What about you? Are you interested to join a Mastermind group too? Or have you just started a group sourcing for members?

If you’re, please let me know here as I may have something in store for you

Update : For your convenience, here’s the list of articles in this Masterminding series :

• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part I
• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part II
• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part III

• Get Your Free Subscriber Downloads Here!


• Subscribe Free Career, Business & Trade Magazines For Your Career & Economic Goals

If you’ve been searching for a particular mastermind group to join, tendency is, you’re looking for a needle in a haystack.

Why do I say that?

Well, because even though masterminding has been a widely established concept and informally practiced in many business organizations, they’re usually manifested in the community as special interest groups, networking teams or even health clubs. Googling or asking around if there’s a mastermind group for you to join is likely to be futile not because they don’t exist. But rather, because they’re embedded in many larger clubs and online forums that most people overlook when they’re conducting the search. And it certainly doesn’t help that most, if not all effective mastermind groups are strictly by invitation only.

In my opinion, finding the right mastermind group to join is only part of the strategy. Knowing why you’re participating is the real deal. Here are 5 steps I think you should review when finding a group to join. Especially if you’re just starting out.

(1) Understand Your Own Goals & Objectives

I know this is going to raise some eyebrows. But isn’t this the reason why you’ve joined the mastermind group for? To help you brainstorm your goals & objectives? Wrong.

You don’t join a mastermind group to help you search for your bottom line. That’s more like personal coaching. Instead, you join a mastermind group to bring focus on the subtasks you’ve to go through to attain your goal. Let me illustrate using an example.

Say, your goal’s to lose 20 pounds in 6 months. You’ve drafted a goal plan which includes tasks such maintaining a healthier diet, working out regularly etc. The mastermind group itself – which in this case can be a ‘Trim & Fit’ club per say – keeps you engaged with things you need to do to lose that weight. And if you’re stuck, that’s where your team members come in. To give you advice such as switching to a different diet plan, workout routine or even trying other natural slimming therapies.

As you can see, members in this ‘Trim & Fit’ club are very sure of what they want to achieve : lose weight. They certainly don’t join it only to realize it’s actually debt consolidation or business startup issues they’re concerned with, do they?

I know this sounds a bit far fetched but look around you, how many people you know are networking for the sake of networking? Or how many of them join groups just because their friends are members too? One of my friends was like that. He was recently fascinated with the Law of Attraction and participated in a special interest group which his friend belonged to. Even after a few sessions of trying to bend a spoon with his “mind power”, he clearly didn’t know what’s the point of doing what he did. Was it to practice focusing his thoughts so that he could leverage this same energy in his business? Or plainly just for fun?

If you’re not clear of your goals, not only are you wasting your time, you’re very likely to find yourself in the wrong company too.

(2) Get Connected to the Grapevine

Once you’re aware of what you want to achieve, jump into the midst and find the biggest party. For example, if you want to lose weight, sign up for the biggest downtown gym membership and interact with other members whenever you’re there for a workout. At the same time, register into those online forums for fitness buffs and post some insightful feedback or interesting questions. And get to know the persons behind those regularly updated health & fitness blogs you’ve been following and write them some comments or personal emails.

While doing this, it’s very important to focus on the value you’re creating. If you’re just saying “hello” every time you see someone in the gym, not only is it difficult to leave to an impression, it’s basically of little constructive value to the other party. Instead, try asking the other person how to use different equipments in the gym or how he developed those awesome looking muscles and you’ll begin a more memorable conversation. It allows you to judge if he possess the knowledge you’ve been seeking for and also lay the foundation for any inquiries you may have in future. Likewise for online forums and blog comments.

In fact, that’s how I got myself into one mastermind group. I’ve been following a very popular and insightful blog for a while. When the blogger decided to start a mastermind group on a goal I’ve been working on, I responded immediately. And it certainly helped that I’ve been exchanging a few personal emails with him slightly before this recruitment.

By pushing yourself to the forefront and mingling with potential masterminding leaders, you’re raising your profile so that you do get recognized for your contribution. At the same time, you’re making your search easier. Because the people you ask may well point you in the right direction. Even if they may not belong to any mastermind group themselves.

(3) Send Out the Vibes

How do you know if there’s a mastermind group in the brewing? Well, observe and if need be, ask!

Assuming you’ve been contributing to the community, you’re very likely to hear such news faster than others who’re not. In my case, since I’ve been reading the feeds of that blog for quite a while, I clearly had a time advantage. Alternatively, you can get off the backseat and ask around.

While doing so, it’s very important to know who you’re asking. Try seeking out the community leaders first as they’re likely to be the top of the grapevine and can save you a lot of time weeding through. They can also help you send out the vibes and connect you with a group that’s recruiting.

And well, if you really really can’t find any mastermind group for the particular goal you’re seeking, the other option is to start one yourself! I will elaborate on this in part III of this guide. So do stay tuned if you’re interested to find out more.

(4) Assess Your Choices

Great. After some scouring and connection, you receive one invitation to join a new mastermind group. Do you accept it immediately? Most people are often too flattered to say “No”. My stand is, “It depends”. Considering whether to accept a membership invitation should depend on :

• How Closely Aligned Is It To Your Goal

  Yes again. But in a slightly different context. Say your goal’s to lose weight while the mastermind group’s objective is strength training. Though they belong to the same Health & Fitness niche, the focus can be quite different. Be aware of what you’re getting into especially since if the time commitment is high.

• Whether You Akin To The Leadership

  This is by far, one of the other more important consideration. How comfortable are you with the leadership style? Some mastermind group leaders prefer to let their members run the show after setting the framework. If you’re someone who prefers to be led step by step, perhaps a more disciplined top down approach is something you’re more comfortable with. Sometimes, your faith in the leader’s ability to run the group and his authority in the niche has a part to play as well. That’s the reason why I signed up for that blogger’s group. Because I’ve absolute confidence in his brand and ability to spearhead the project. So far, I’ve not been disappointed.

• Whether You Can Live Up To The Commitment Level

  Well, if the group reviews on a weekly basis and you can’t afford the time, shouldn’t you look elsewhere? Likewise if you can’t afford the monthly membership fee for some premium mastermind groups.

• Whether There’s Any Previous Accolades

  This would be one of the least likely considerations. But some mastermind groups are periodically accepting members on an ongoing basis. So, determining if this is worth your time and money (at times) could be as easy as checking with the existing or previous members.

(5) Take the Plunge!

You’ve done the research and everything looks good. But before you sign on the dotted line, here are some 3 golden rules to bear in mind:

• Don’t Just Open The Mind But Close The Heart

  Many join the mastermind groups to brainstorm new revolutionary ideas, but neglect the fact that such groups are still made up of people. Absorb or refute the new knowledge or advice where you deem fit but do in a diplomatic manner. Shower attention on your fellow members just like how you would loved to be taken care of. Remember, the spiritual connection of a mastermind group is natured from the heart. Not just the mind.

• Don’t Just Say The Words But Lose the Action

  If the group’s creative and dynamic, many new and exciting ideas can be generated. But it’s easy to get fascinated by all the frenzy that you overlook the execution. Say all you want but grab the most interesting idea, put in that little bit of effort and make it a reality. Even if you fail, it’s ok. You may have lost some time and resources perhaps. But what you’ve gained is much more valuable. That is, experience.

• Don’t Just Receive But Never Give

  If you’re a somewhat inexperienced member in the team, tendency is, you’re usually on the receiving end of someone’s kindness and generosity. Reciprocate it with a word of thanks, a gift or even better, your skills and knowledge. No matter how little you think you know, there’s definitely some way you can give it back. And when you start giving, you realize you end up getting more. More experience. More exposure.

Update 27/12/07 : For your convenience, here’s the list of articles in this Masterminding series :

• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part I
• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part II
• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part III

• Get Your Free Subscriber Downloads Here!


• Subscribe Free Career, Business & Trade Magazines For Your Career & Economic Goals

Thanks to Napoleon Hill and his 1937 classic Think & Grow Rich, the concept of masterminding have taken the world by storm.

Successful businessmen – whether the richer industrialists from the early 20th century to the modern day’s business powerhouses – have all confessed to using mastermind groups in a way or another. In case you think this is an exclusive innovation in the commercial world, look around you.

Housewives participate in weekly gatherings to learn different food recipes from one another. College students leverage study groups to work on their term papers. Even seemingly innocuous kids have worked with their classmates to grow their baseball card collections! Amazing, isn’t it?

Perhaps you may be thinking “So what? What has that got to do with me?” Well, think about it. Are you experiencing goals stagnancy and need some fresh ideas to spruce up things? Do you have difficulty with daily motivation on your goals because none of your friends and family support what you’re doing? Have you been searching for someone with a specific skill to partner on a particular project? If yes, a mastermind group can jolly well be the breakthrough you’re looking for!

Why do I say that?

Many months back, I was quite fortunate to be able to join a couple of online mastermind groups. All for slightly different purposes. Not only have I benefited tremendously from the synergy, I’ve got to know a bunch of like minded friends. From all walks of life. From all nationalities. All working for similar goals. What did I give up to join these groups? Well, other than a few hours of my time a day, I don’t think I’ve sacrifice much. In fact, the benefits outweighs the costs so much that I’m glad I’ve done this after all!

So, What Exactly Is A Mastermind Group?

According to Napoleon, the Master Mind is defined to be the

… coordination of knowledge and effort, in a spirit of harmony, between 2 or more people for the attainment of a definite purpose.

In other words, it’s 2 or more people working towards a common goal. They’re just like goal buddies. Except that the commitment to meet up regularly and “officially” is stronger. The way the group is rounded up is also more stringent. So, don’t be surprised if you find that you actually need an invitation to join certain groups. Because at the end of the day, it really depends on what the leader’s intention is when he first started it.

But no matter how different each group can be, some characteristics are still inherently similar:

1. Synergy Within A Common Goal

   Needless to say, every member must have a similar reason for being there. The difference is, by working on your own individual goal, you’re actually helping the others with theirs. For example, your goal is to be able to earn $x from your home based business every month. By seeking advice on your own business frustrations during the weekly meetings, you’re actually encouraging the rest to consider different business conditions and scenarios. Which can affect their own operations in time to come.

2. Varied Experience, Expertise & Skill Sets

   Member demographics differ but there’s a very high chance that everyone is of diverse backgrounds and experience levels. Junior members benefit from the greater industry experience and advice of the senior mentors. Senior members can tap on the unique skill sets of junior members. There’s this theory about joining a group whose members are already where you’ll like to be in your life – or who are at least a level above yourself. My only question is, why would these people allow you to be in their circle if you’re not already where they are? Well, unless you pay a premium for it. Like a membership fee. Otherwise, the safer bet is to leverage on your existing skill sets and sell it when there’s an opportunity.

3. High Accountability & Standards On Quality

   Whatever you’ve promised to achieve with the group is held accountable. You’ll be asked to state your goals, justify them and review your progress on a weekly basis. Imagine being caught in a situation when you’ve nothing new to update since the last meeting. Will you be spurred to action so that you’ve got some progress on your bottom line? Probably very likely, isn’t it? The groups I’m in don’t hold anyone custody for anything. Nor do they hold weekly meetings of such sort. But I guess at the end of the day, it really depends on the mode of the operandi. And how comfortable each team member is, with the way things are pushed forward.

4. Strong Giving Spirit

   An amazing attribute I’ve seen in the groups I’m in is that most of the members are very generous. They’re very willing to give. Their knowledge. Their time. Even their resources at times. In fact, the more they give, the more they receive. For example, there’s this guy who’ll constantly go the extra mile, give encouragement, positive feedback without the others asking for it. Whenever he has a task for the group, many will step forward and offer assistance.

5. Limited in Size

   Though the ones I’m in are relatively large online groups, traditional masterminding work best with 5-6 people in a team. Anything smaller loses its group dynamics. Anything bigger becomes difficult to manage. The use of online technologies such as forums, social networking tools etc have made it much easier to manage bigger groups. But in my opinion, a close knitted small team exudes stronger spiritual synergy and flexibility. Which far outweighs the numbers you get from big groups.

Update : For your convenience, here’s the list of articles in this Masterminding series :

• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part I
• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part II
• The Beginner’s Guide To Mastermind Groups – Part III

• Get Your Free Subscriber Downloads Here!


• Subscribe Free Career, Business & Trade Magazines For Your Career & Economic Goals